Road FC 39 took place in Seoul, South Korea this past weekend and the only word to describe the event is nuts, literally. In the Co-Main Event, Openweight fighters Hyun Man Myung and Aorigele (One name? Who are you? Seal?) faced off in a fight I won’t soon forget. The bout officially ended in a No Contest after only 9 seconds of action due to an accidental kick to the groin. Take a look for yourselves and see what you think:
FUCK. MY. LIFE. Accidental kick to the groin? Are you shitting me? More like a murderous attempt to explode what little nutsack is exposed below Aorigele’s fupa. It’s one thing to go into the cage and risk getting knocked out, but no one should have to be worried that their balls may end up across the North Korean border. Poor Aorigele’s testicles are probably being smacked around by Kim Jong Un and Dennis Rodman right now in a game of putt putt nutt. Sad thing is, you can tell his nuts definitely flew right out of his body and the stadium. Officials bring in a body bag, check his injury, and immediately start to pull it up over his face when they see it’s just an empty sack. They essentially assume he’s going to die from the injury. To cap everything off, how about the smug reaction out of Hyun Man Myung? He doesn’t even check on the man he just gave the nutcracker from hell to, but rather bows to everyone in the audience like he accomplished some amazing psychopathic feat.
If Aorigele is still alive, I hope Road FC gets their act together and gives him the Championship Belt. God knows he is going to need it to cover up the huge shin indent where his package used to be.